My question(s) deal with matrimony. I recall in my early high school studies, that the first fruit of this sacrament is the union of man and woman. Child is the second fruit. Am I right? Lately I’ve been hearing debates on sex before marriage and on same sex marriage. Strong arguments against these two lie on idea that marriage functions to reproduce.
My Questions:
1. I don’t argue child reproduction, but is the impetus to argue misrepresenting the first fruit of marriage?
2. Is marriage for the reproduction of a child really the catechism of Catholic teaching?
3. St. Henry and his wife St. Cunegundes vowed perpetual chastity (which I’m understanding is no sex). Firstly, did I get my definition right? Secondly, if I did then how come they were allow this vows? Is there something I missed in their story? I got the info on Catholic.org.
Yours truly, Matrimonial Queries

Dear Matrimonial Queries,

It was St. Augustine who made popular the notion of the “goods of the sacrament of matrimony.” He spoke of 1) descendants, 2) mutual love and fidelity, and 3) witness to God’s love. (I note that we can therefore talk about why Christians marry from at least three points of view: social, personal and spiritual.)

Closer to our own time, theologians have spoken about the “ends” or “purposes” of marriage: 1) procreation and education of children, and 2) mutual love and support of the spouses. Traditionally, procreation was considered the “primary” end, while mutual love was seen as the “secondary” end of marriage. However, the Vatican II document The Church in the Modern World, in its chapter on marriage, seems to speak of the two ends of marriage as equal in importance. This makes sense when you consider that the effective bearing and educating of children depends heavily on the quality of love, fidelity and support between the parents. The Catechism of the Catholic Church confirms this view when it quotes the Code of Canon Law which says: “The matrimonial covenant…is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring….” (I.e. it gives equal weight to the two ends.) Some theologians have gone farther and suggest that the primary end of marriage is the mutual love between husband and wife, while family becomes the procreation and education of children becomes the secondary end.

I don’t know about Henry and Cunegunde in particular, but there are definitely stories of married couples taking a vow not to have sexual relations. In my understanding of marriage, this would be an anomaly! If it is to be defended at all, under normal circumstances I would say it could only make sense in later life, after a couple has “procreated and educated their offspring.”

I hope this gives you some concrete information to consider when pondering the questions that you presented.

aka Fr. David C.Ss.R.